I grew up learning how to do everything on my own. From difficulties in school to applying to college to my first job, I did it all on my own. I had to as there were other people to worry about; I had to help my parents raise my two younger brothers.
I was raised to be fiercely independent but also foolishly arrogant; I believed I could do everything by myself. This self-starter mentality allowed me to succeed for a while when I worked in a startup, until my performance did not meet expectations.
When I was overwhelmed, I insisted on figuring it out on my own instead of asking for help. However, when this led to mistakes at work, I realized that is not efficient nor effective strategy.
It’s okay to ask for help and say “I don’t know”.
There is a fine line between when you should problem-solve on your own and when you should seek input from others. Nonetheless, once you realize that needing the help of others is common and actually a smarter decision in most cases, you don’t feel as powerless but humble in realizing your human limitations.
It takes humility to recognize that you cannot do it all on your own.
I am unlearning my old ways and reframing my false notions. Asking for help does not always take away your power, but more often than not, strengthens your relationships and builds a more sustainable framework for success. For instance, with more people, you have access to a larger pool of knowledge.
No one knows everything and you can learn something from everyone. Your job is to be open and humble enough to see that.
That is maturity.