Only you can fully understand you.
There is simultaneous melancholy and joy in this statement.
Melancholy because you will never be entirely understood. No one will know all parts of you. Even if you try to expose someone to the various facets of your life, only you will fully experience the life you live. On that vein, expecting someone else to fully understand you is ludicrous.
But there is also great joy in knowing that you are your own. Joy in the sense that you have complete independence. You are the owner, the driver, and the purveyor of your own happiness. Hold this with a sense of pride.
When you did something spectacular, treat yourself.
When you impress yourself, treat yourself.
When you do what you can’t, treat yourself.
That’s how you motivate yourself to push harder next time.
When life brings you to your knees, remember where you came from. Bring it back to your roots. Remember the stories of your parents and grandparents; their trials, tribulations, and triumphs. Remember that you are the culmination of all those hardships. It is true. You are their legacy. Their stories are your stories, and you are their story. If we get up, dig deep, and push the story a little farther, there is love and sacrifice at the end of the journey.
Know your worth then add tax.
Then go out there and advocate for yourself.
You teach others how to treat you.
Within my friends groups, I’m notorious for getting into crazy situations. The reason is, I am a yas woman. If I get into a situation where I must choose to stay or go, I choose go as much as possible (that is, if my intuition tells me I am not in danger).
Saying yes has led to stand-up paddle boarding in the San Francisco Bay, cooking delicious meals with a stranger, grabbing dessert with a “boss ass bitch”, endless nights of dancing, multiple concerts, tours at amazing companies, unbelievable sunset views, and so much more.
Today’s example: I was running through Lake Merritt after my MLK volunteer event and ran into Anthony and his old coworker Nathan. Ant invited me to eat pho for dinner later that night. I gladly accepted the invitation. After dinner, the three of us went to (my first) comedy event at a bar I’ve been meaning to try. I laughed for two hours straight. The lineup was stellar, and the venue was extremely hip. Now, I am exhausted and do not want to talk to anyone, but I am so happy I went. I will definitely come back for Monday night comedy.
Say yes, because why not.
Many of my most memorable moments stemmed from moments of spontaneity.
How could it not when you’re open to what the world has to offer?
I once told my friend that “Wrong turns make great stories.”
She responded, “If you live to tell the tale.”
There is great value in doing the thing you’ve always wanted to do, in exploring your curiosities, in taking risks and leaps. It makes you that much more interesting.